Women have — for generations — had the stigma of being bad with money. Lucy begged Ricky for her allowance. Carrie Bradshaw blew her retirement fund on shoes. Even now, many of us can name at least one girlfriend who splits a purchase between cash and credit so she doesn’t have to own up to the cost to her spouse.
Women are getting a bad wrap. These days, more and more of us are taking charge when it comes to our family’s money. At the end of last year, a study by FindLaw.com found that 37 percent of married women between the ages of 18 – 34 handle all of the household finances, compared to 30 percent of married men. In a 2006 study by Money magazine, 60 percent of women said they’re responsible for budgeting, bill paying, and day-to-day spending in their households. More…
You know how I feel about how money – one of the number one causes of divorce – should be handled in a marriage or long-term relationship. But I now I want to know how you feel.
For those of you who don’t know, I’m a contributor to More magazine. For my column in an upcoming issue, I’m looking for women who will tell me how the finances are handled in their relationship. Do you and your partner merge every cent? Keep everything separate? A little of both?
Share your system – and why it works for you – by sending me an email.
I’ve had a lot to say about money and relationships lately, and keeping with that trend, tomorrow I’ll speak with Dr. Bonnie Eaker, about her book “Financial Infidelity: Seven Steps to Conquering the #1 Relationship Wrecker.” Tune in to Oprah Radio at 12pm EDT (on SIRIUS Channel 195 or XM Channel 156) to hear her take.
I was on Today this morning with some money advice for Nick and Leigh, the couple who got married on the Plaza today for the show’s annual Today Throws a Wedding series. Here’s the clip:
It’s that time of year again…wedding season. According to the Association of Bridal Consultants, nearly 22% of couples tie the knot in July and August. But after the rice is thrown and the cake is gone, couples are left to deal with one of the biggest causes of martial discord: managing their finances. Here are some tips to help you keep the peace:
Understand your differences. It’s not reasonable to assume that just because you tie the knot you all of a sudden become the same person. What you have to do, therefore, is understand HOW you are different, how those differences are going to worry or stress your partner, and keep lines of communications open so that you both understand what is happening with the family pie.
Joint or separate accounts? Try both. There is a school of thought that says the more you merge your money, the more you trust each other and the marriage. I am not completely of that school — quite possibly because I’ve been divorced. I am a big fan of joint AND separate accounts. The way this works best is if you come up with a household budget that the joint account will cover. It must include the amount you want to save for your joint goals (vacation, house, retirement, emergencies). Then figure out what equal percentage of both salaries will cover it, transfer that much in from the separate accounts, and leave the rest. And the bills covered by the joint accounts shouldn’t ALWAYS be paid by the same person. One will gravitate toward these tasks but make sure you switch it up at least once a year.
Financial autonomy is a must. When it comes to my marriage, I need to be able to buy a cup of coffee without checking with him. More…
